Julie Marie Weiss

Traumatic, Sudden Loss

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Traumatic, Sudden Loss

Members: 14
Latest Activity: 1 day ago

Traumatic, Sudden Loss

I have started this group for people who like myself have suddenly, tragically and traumatically lost a loved one.

My mom died 8 weeks ago (August 17, 2009) She had been sick but I did not know the true extent of her illness. Her doctor knew she did not have long and I went to each doctor visit and talked to him at the hospital and he never told me and I do not believe mom knew either. I am not sure.

I found my mom sitting up on her bed and I know I knew she was gone. I still am in deep shock and cry occasionally but only a minute or two. Then I am back to not feeling or feel numb.

Discussion Forum

At a loss

has anyone broke out in a stress rash after loss?

hello All, I'm new to this group and would prefer to keep my name private due to the media attention in my uncle's death and that it has not yet gone to trial. I'm trying to find a support network...

Started by At a loss Nov 13.

Raven Tompkins

When does this get easier? Or less confusing? 2 Replies

I'm new, this is my first post. On September 3, my Mother died from a massive stroke. I'm 44 and have friends who've lost parents. When I imagined what it might be like to lose my Mother, what I im...

Started by Raven Tompkins. Last reply by Brenda Paradis Nov 11.

Janis Frenzel

I just need some help to get through my loss(es) 2 Replies

I lost my grandson to an accident in August 2008. He was my first grandchild and was so special, precious and wonderful. It has been devastating for out entire family. And now his father (my son) a...

Started by Janis Frenzel. Last reply by Janis Frenzel Oct 28.

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janey sumner Comment by janey sumner 1 day ago
i just lost my grandma who i have lived with for the last year and was really close and i am really missing her its really hard right now because of the holidays coming up
Theresa Wheeler Comment by Theresa Wheeler on November 5, 2009 at 9:15am
Julie:
I know the feeling. I have been in a fog since my husband died. I do the things I need to do but there is no joy in my life right now. I do everything I can to get out of bed in the morning and take care of my son. Thanks for sharing
Julie Marie Weiss Comment by Julie Marie Weiss on November 4, 2009 at 8:43pm
It has been awhile since I have been able to write as I am in the middle of my externship for the Ma program. Your stories have all touched me very much and we all have lost someone we really love in a very sudden and dramatic way!!

Does anybody have trouble getting back to life? I have NO desire to do anything and I have worked real hard to get where I am at in my career and I have little desire and everything I take to get going in the morning. I just do not feel like doing anything.
Brenda Paradis Comment by Brenda Paradis on October 23, 2009 at 9:27am
I am so glad to have found a place where people understand the profound grief that I feel. Katherine - your post about your daughter really touched me. In August my father bought a 4 wheeler. The afternoon after he bought it he tried it out and went for a ride down the street from our house. For some reason he went in a ditch and was thrown over the handlebars of the ATV. The handlebar broke his leg and severed his femoral artery. He bled to death in about 8 minutes. My mother, myself and my son all happened to be driving home in separate cars when we came upon the ambulances and fire trucks. He died only about a hundred feet from our driveway. In some ways I wish we had gotten there before he died and in some ways I'm glad we didn't get there until after. He was gone about 10 minutes by the time we happened upon the accident. Every day in order to leave our house we have to drive past the spot where he died. My 8 year old often talks about the day grampa died. What can I do but encourage him to talk and ask question. It all feels so wrong and I feel so helpless. But as I started my post, it does help some to hear from others who are experiencing these crushing feelings......
donna henderson Comment by donna henderson on October 23, 2009 at 4:35am
katherine i am so sorry about your daughter how can a company be allowed to operate something like this without any proper training? Have you looked into a legal advice. how old was she what was her name. my condolences to you i know that it doesnt seem like it will get better but there is light at the end of the tunnel i too am going through the same thing my cousin killed himself, and right now i am on auto pilot i just keep going because it is the only thing i know how to do, my life is so dark right now i sleep all day sometimes i dont sleep, sometimes i eat sometimes i dont eat. the hardest part was having to call my brother and to have to tell him that doug had killed himself. btw doug was my cousin, 24 yrs old, and now he is dead. all i can say is wtf, and im pissed off. anyhoo got to try to get to sleep.
Katherine Ellis Comment by Katherine Ellis on October 23, 2009 at 3:21am
We had to stand there and watch while they worked on our daughter. we were white water rafting, she went down a small fall and fell out. She pushed her foot down to kick back up and it was stuck in some rocks. The company had nothing set up or trained in case of an accident. So I watched our daughter die. This has changed me. Part of my heart will always be done. I don't laugh anymore or feel joy. Life is darker, depressing. I know all of you will understand. I feel like crying but the tears are all dried up. i know i will see her again. but that is such a long time to wait. I miss her joy, laughter and fun. she was my best friend.
Benny Shipton Comment by Benny Shipton on October 21, 2009 at 4:53pm
my dad died suddenly from a heart attack, aged 50, he was watching the film alexander before i went to bed and we had a conversation about why they had irish accents in the film, then i said goodnight and 15 minutes later i heard something crash into my bedroom door and that was it.
donna henderson Comment by donna henderson on October 18, 2009 at 12:19am
i was visiting my dad and its been five years gone now still miss him, but more so i am grieving the loss of my cousin doug.
Julie Marie Weiss Comment by Julie Marie Weiss on October 17, 2009 at 7:46pm
Theresa I am sorry that your husband died so suddenly and oh so young! Yes it will get easier but life will never be the same for either one of you. How do you help a child grieving I do not know. People seem to stop talking about the loved one who died, do not do this. Cherish the wonderful memories atleast that is what I try to do.
Julie Marie Weiss Comment by Julie Marie Weiss on October 17, 2009 at 6:52pm
Donna my heart goes out to you and the loss of your dad. Did you live with him or just visit him and found him? I lived with my mom & took care of her for 3.5 years. We were so close. I miss her so much!!!
 

Members (14)

donna henderson Janis Frenzel Brenda Paradis Raven Tompkins At a loss Julie Marie Weiss Diana Young erika garcia Mandi Shoopman Katherine Ellis Theresa Wheeler Benny Shipton Latisha janey sumner
 
 

Latest Activity

andrea higgins and prozzie joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
4 hours ago
Thanks Gail
4 hours ago
Karen - I'm so sorry you are having such a hard time today but quite understand how you feel. And yes, we do these 'festive' things for our families and friends but sometimes we need to do something for US the way we feel we want to do it. If that...
8 hours ago
Dear Cindy, Oh my! I guess I don't believe that God causes storms just so we can weather them. That would mean that God created my daughter and then made her die just to see if I could "weather the storm." Perhaps that's the way one pastor explain...
11 hours ago
I set here alone on a holiday I use to enjoy (thanksgiving) I just couldnt find the strength to put on that fake face I needed to to go be with hubbys & my family. They are all caring people I love - I just struggle to be - let alone be around peo...
11 hours ago
Thanksgiving (U.S.) Thanks to you all for being here. I needed a little quiet time before putting on my "happy holiday face" so I checked the site this morning. The comments by Gail, Katherine, Karen and Wendy were very much appreciated. I too wan...
12 hours ago
"Hugs Love & Strength to all of you"
yesterday
Thank you, Diana.
yesterday
I hear that a lot... "get over it" The people who say this have obviously not gone through what we all have. A death whether sudden or over time is not something you can just get over. It doesn't matter if you knew them 1 day, 1 month, 1 year, or ...
yesterday
Tania Taylor we will be putting up our Christmas tree and decorations on Friday this year.
yesterday
my mom and i are having a hard time with the holidays coming up we are taking dinner to a friends house because she just moved and doesnt know were everything is so we are taking food to them but it wont be the same with out grandma there she has ...
yesterday
So beautiful
yesterday
i just lost my grandma who i have lived with for the last year and was really close and i am really missing her its really hard right now because of the holidays coming up
yesterday
yesterday
janey sumner and Stephanie Jasmine Marie joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Stephanie, I know how you feel. It's such a sad story. I grew up listening to michael. We were only about a month apart in age. It seems to me he was so troubled and had no one that really understood him. Maybe he has found peace. I certainly woul...
yesterday
Wishing you all the comfort and support we all will need, May we all cry alot, love alot, and eat little.. :),
yesterday
Hello. It's just before Thanksgiving. I'm still bent out of shape about Michael. Yesterday was a particularly bad day. I may not be in the right forum for something such as this as I may be less in a grieving place and more in an obsession. I NEVE...
yesterday
For those of us who are having a difficulty coping. I am very upset at this and I think I need some guidance. I never met him but it felt like I knew him.
yesterday
Wishing everyone peace over the holidays - I know how hard this time of year is for Bereaved parents and hope that you all manage to find a little piece of happiness with family and friends. Of course, there is a huge piece of your 'celebration' m...
on Tuesday

Books

To One In Sorrow

Let me come in where you are weeping, friend,
And let me take your hand.
I, who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand.
Let me come in--I would be very still beside you in your grief;
I would not bid you cease your weeping, friend,
Tears bring relief. Let me come in--and hold your hand,
For I have known a sorrow such as yours, And understand.

-Grace Noll Crowell

The Light Beyond

The Glass Table - a book for children who have lost a sibling

In The Glass Table by Leigh K. Cunningham, fourteen year-old Jack Irwin-Hunter hikes to Lake Como after running away from home. Since his younger brother was killed in a tragic accident, Jack has suffered alone while his parents mourned their loss. He believes his parents no longer care about him—his mother is always crying and clutching a photo of Colby, and his father wanders their garden aimlessly. When Jack is cast into a spell to...

Over 250 funeral poems, instantly...

Did you know about our ebook of over 250 funeral poems and readings? Don't lose valuable time searching for the perfect poem or reading - we've already done all the hard work, to save you the trouble. And you can download it instantly. It's one of the most comprehensive and thoughtful collection of sympathy poems, quotes and readings available today. Whoever you have lost, this carefully crafted collection of poems and readings will help you...

New memorial website Friends At Rest

It’s a unique feeling, when it finally dawns on you that someone who has been a part of your life for such a long time is no longer there. It’s a sickening realisation that stops you in your tracks. In your mind you can visualise the person, smiling, talking, living, but when the vision fades you realise that this is now your only connection to them. Through memories, photographs, anecdotes and, on a higher plane,...

When a pet dies...

This is one of the kindest things you may ever see.. It is not known who replied, but there is a beautiful soul working in the dead letter office of the US postal service. Our 14 year old dog, Abbey, died last month. The day after she died, my 4 year old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so...

Headstone funding for low-income families who have lost a baby

Just heard from this very worthwhile foundation and thought it would be helpful to spread the news: "We have a foundation that helps provide low-income families who have a lost a baby with funding for a permanent memorial stone for the gravesite. We have been around since 2003 and have helped 6 families just this year alone in getting headstones for their angel babies. (See www.dempseyburdick.com) We would love it if you would pass on...

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